Just a collage of feelings and volitions, I am a man who knows that long time before thinking everything had already done. Every sentences had been pronounced somewhere by somebody, so there are no pure words for the new faces. I`ve got a gun: soul. With one single bullet: fondness. I will shoot you down, cruel world. My brain is going to argue meantime I am not a copy but a paste. Therefore I don`t need copyright, I am free to imitate myself and reproduce God`s will, incarnated by others. I am the freedom of act and strength of will, a work in progress. A backup of my broken dreams. Sophisticated health and safety advice, that`s what I am. By nature I search affection and attachment, because I am a crazy and infirm beggar of love. After five minutes, or sometime even less, I give credit to all kind of people. However I am telling you: do not trust anybody. Yes, I am a stubborn masochist. I am the up-and-coming failure, the harvester of sorrow… but drunk with joy of life. And why not? I have confidence in my claustrophobia because I know and confront my limits. I am an animal called homo sapiens, a lonely creature who doesn`t admit his weakness. I must try my best, because I am not a cheap reward for myself but a compulsory consequence. A never ending story, the unfinished 9th symphony. After all, life is the worst challenge to be bigger in feeling, in hunger, in power, in dominancy, in everything. Bigger and better, so far so good. So that`s why I need at least 5000 so called friends in the holly virtuality. But I have five fingers on my right hand, and I am afraid to start count. Just face the reality for God`s sake. Anyway the happiest creature is that who can count till five without hesitation. I am a montage of sentiments, the avatar of my sensations. Headstrong donkey, I am a good contrary Protestant who knows that faith has nothing to do with religion and dogma. Each day is a precedent for tomorrow when I can see the changing color of happiness. All around but not inside. Inside out I duplicate my sadistic craft of giving everything without asking anything. I do what I think and I believe in what I say: always in the middle, I face my edges, not afraid of the narrow path. Practicing what I preach, became hypocrite. I do not murder – I wear leather on my skin. I do not eat flesh – but fish is not meat. I do not commit adultery – so you shouldn`t look in my eyes. I do not steal, I just kept for myself the bird`s voice. Let me introduce them: my neighbors are Mr. Silence and Mrs. Solitude. I have no witness against them. Down the vortex, up the overcast, I am Gízá`s complete lack of surprise and anyway, my neighbor’s house is ugly, his wife is fat. Yeah, I am your seven sin. Liberal but conservative, butterfly with armour, flag without stars. Always in the middle, never right nor left. The burning sky and cold evening, yes, I am the pure unpredictability. Changing weather that`s what I am, constant pain in the ass. I am your special wish and darkness nightmare, the ugly space between two beautiful words, the sick desire between time and space, a never ending story with no beginning. I am poncho and black suite and I won`t judge the book by its cover. Anyhow, I do not judge anybody and anything, because this is God`s job. At least, I try… not to judge. Not even myself. Still, I`m not crazy. Just ask my toaster. I am Civic and the brutal power of the engine. I can drive but I don`t need driving license. I am fuel and matches. Falling down and growing up, I am all the time a hopeless tragedy and tragic happiness. Meantime I have always a shoulder for you to cry on. But please don`t cry all the time, don`t make me sick and tired. I am spicy and ice and sweet as a punch, hot as hell when you need this. Or even when you don`t. And you are right: I don`t care whilst I do. All the time. I am trick and tricky, a desperate joke. I am challenge till first blood, I am your blood on my soul: I`m you. Learning to trust and letting my guard down. Anyone has the right to keep quiet, so you shouldn`t say a word. Let me bring you down: I`m telling you the whole truth and nothing but the truth, without hesitation. Walking on the green line. I am fierce independence mixed with a twinge of fear. I am the amen from the prayer and the first cry of a new born baby. I don`t know from where and why, but I can tell you the sadistic what. Today is the first day of my remaining life and each tomorrow will be just another today but I have not even a clue about this. I am similar in difference, colorful joy wrapped in gray shadow. I am the golden fish`s voice and you cannot put me back in the water. My stupidity is endless, realize that fair tales suck. One idiot will transform my dreams in fish tikka, no matter: I am pure gold. Even if my dreams haven`t got any gold bones inside. I am creativity to the point of distraction. Actually I am the symphony of destruction and when I see you next time, it will be forever. I am the blind and his dog in the city centre. Walking bomb with no remorse, trying to avoid the final obstacles: me, myself and Gízá. I am black hate and green revenge. I am blue eyes and blond hesitation. As a tracking number or online status on the fresh order, I am just a list of questions. Pending queries. Bored and excited all the time I am thinking too much. I am a proper winter, especially snowing! In a country with no snowman. I am your momentary lapse of reason, an eternal optimist disguised as a dark pessimist. I will quote you as a bastard, never let you quote me down. But before all of this please let me introduced myself to my own feelings. For sure: I am the book keeper of your broken dreams, the facebook master with no link to the reality. I am your wish and chips, enjoy me. Try to eat me, but taste me careful: cheap whore I am, who all the time is answering you this stupid yes dear. Dangerous is the narrow path of God without NO but I cannot lost myself into the no man land. I am weak ankle and strong heart. I am death and taxes, staying in line at custom. I am the early morning smile on the face of an officer. Also I am a dumb joke and I am love of every kind. Because of this I never apologize. I use too often the first person, like the suicidal Russian poets. I am silly, stupid, a day without sunshine and sunset. Just a lazy afternoon, what else… Telling you the ultimate truth: if you do not agree with the system, cut your hair. Why don`t we just take the safety labels off everything and see what happens? I am brutal honesty with heartfelt meaning. I am insanity, yeah, the flying hamster over the rainbow: don`t let the system get you down! Everybody is stupid only I am helicopter. Or that certain message in a bottle: just an expired birth certificate. I am the protector and guardian who sometimes still needs protecting himself. I am a child. I am the rainbow. I am a cloud. I am never conforming but always compromising. I am broken hearts and butterfly kisses. I am more languages then one, so you cannot sell me just like that. I am crazy colorful dreams. I am always learning something new, I am a surprise around every corner. Always growing and ever changing, try to find myself, I know anyway that the chase is better than the catch. So wake up and live!
Tags: homo hibernatus
